Not Even Hanging By A Rope

I was all alone in the elevator (or "lift" for you people in the U.K.).  I'm not sure what I was thinking when I put the rope through the doors.  I think I wanted to kind of bookmark the floor that I had come from  Everything worked well for a while.

I rode up and down a few floors before I realized that things were wonky and it was because of my rope. It had messed up the mechanisms that run the elevator.  Luckily I got the rope all pulled back into the elevator car.  Unluckily, it was too late. 

Suddenly, the car turned sideways.  The doors on the elevator were now my floor and I was going down FAST.  As in a barely-controlled fall.  I remember saying out loud, "I'm going to die!". 

Fortunately, I noticed some ledges on the outer wall.  I jumped onto the next one that I came to.  Whew!  Safe!

People helped me out of the elevator.  I didn't want them to know that I had caused the problem.  Me and my damn rope.  I knew that the repair bill on that elevator would be A LOT!  So I just acted as if I was so lucky to have escaped that death trap. 

But wait!  There was evidence!  A video from inside the elevator showed the weapon of elevator destruction: My rope!

The last I knew, it was going to take a year of investigation in order to get to the bottom of this crime.

A year from now, if I disappear from Blogland, will you come visit me in prison?