You will go through your life thinking there was a day in second grade that you must have missed, when grown-ups came in and explained everything important to the other kids. They said, "Look, you're human, you're going to feel isolated and afraid a lot of the time, and have bad self-esteem, and feel uniquely ruined, but here is the magic phrase that will take this feeling away. It will be like a feather that will lift you out of the fear and self-consciousness every single time, all through your life." And then they told the children who were there that day the magic phrase that everyone else in the world knows about and uses when feeling blue, which only you don't know, because you were home sick the day the grown-ups told the children the way the whole world works.
But there was not such a day in school. No one got the instruction. That is the secret of life. Everyone is flailing around, winging it most of the time, trying to find the way out, or through, or up, without a map. This lack of instruction manual is how most people develop compassion, and how they figure out to show up, care, help and serve, as the only way of filling up and being free. Otherwise, you grow up to be someone who needs to dominate and shame others, so no one will know that you weren't there the day the instructions were passed out.
- Anne Lamott writing to her new grandson in her book, Some Assembly Required
I stole it from here.
And then I went to my library's website and ordered the book.
When I saw the title of your post, I immediately thought of one of my favourite James Taylor songs
ReplyDeletehttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X60qHVqarZE
Dancing on that Blade of Grass of his!
Very interesting post. It's probably a good thing there isn't a phrase that we either learned or missed in second grade. If we learned it, we'd be held more accountable to it and judged more harshly for our struggles. I admire how you jump on the opportunity to get books from the library as soon as you get the notion to read one! I know you've done it before. I also love reading comments people make . . . I learn a lot. Now I have to listen to Dancing's favorite James Taylor song. Thank you Dancing! And thank you Carol!
ReplyDeleteDancing, Thanks for the reminder and the video. Such a sweet song. Such a sweet man. I keep forgetting to tell you that my friend's daughter who lives in Boulder is good friends with JT's daughter and, through her, she is friends with the whole JT family. My friends tell us quite often (and always after the fact) about spending the evening listening to JT sing in some intimate place. Maybe someday they will tell us beforehand and invite us to join them. :-)
ReplyDeleteLet me know and I'll come over and gatecrash!
DeleteDancing
It's a deal! (Now I have to let my friends know how important it is for them to invite me to the next JT event - so I can see my friend from the U.K. Oh, and so I can see and listen to J.T., too!)
DeleteG.G.,
ReplyDeleteWell, by the time the book is available, I will have forgotten how I ever heard about it. I think I'm number 58 in line for it. I love how book surprises show up for me at the library!
Carol: Oh no! #58? At least that means you are waiting to read something that's apparently popular, right?
ReplyDeleteI like this story. Thank you!
ReplyDeleteG.G., Yep! Anne Lamott is very popular. I think I have only read one or two of her books, but I enjoy her blog writings. Even though I will most likely never be a gram, I think most of us moms have The Gram within us and this book called to me.
ReplyDeleteYou're welcome, Thomas-Who-Will-Be-Marrying Soon!
ReplyDelete